Dear Diary: 5 Hours ’til Departure

Oh, hello there. It’s been a while since we’ve seen one another, how have you been? Oh, me? Thanks for asking; I’ve been swell.

Swell like the the ocean, that is.

Up and down and rolling with the types of experiences and wholehearted emotions that remind you that you’re here and that you’re alive. Life isn’t always forgiving, but just as the wave is capable of swallowing you whole and holding you under until dotted stars start to pop behind your eyelids, the beauty and exhilaration of it never ceases to make that trip through the wringer worthwhile. Despite the lows, the highs have been undeniable and undeniably worthwhile. Life has been alright. Life has been better than alright.

And here I sit, a mere five hours from departure. five hours until the adventure that has been enriching my life time after time again for the past year begins. five hours ’til liftoff, baby. Five hours, and I still haven’t decided how I feel about that.

I’m stoked. That much is certain. Not in a giddy or exuberant way, but from somewhere deep down inside in a place that’s been waiting a long time for this. I’m curious. The one thing I’m certain about is absolute uncertainty. I’m a bit sad. As ready as I am to step onto that plane, saying goodbye hits me right in the feels. I’ve been enjoying myself so much lately, and Toronto has this habit of coming so alive as the temperatures start to rise, that I don’t feel quite done with it yet. That said, I’m also happy. I’m leaving on a high note, and that’s all I can ask for. The other day, somebody asked me if I’m nervous — the first person to pose such a question. It caught me off guard. Nervous? Of all the things I’ve been feeling, it didn’t even occur to me to be nervous. I had to stop and think about it, just to be sure.

Nah, I’m not nervous. What would be the point of that?

Forty-eight hours from now, after three days of my life have passed by (don’t even ask; timezones hurt my brain), I’ll be in Australia. In an entirely different place, on an entirely different continent, on the other side of the planet. That’s pretty cool.

Bring it on.

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